Want to feel successful as a new parent?
We all want to be confident parents.
Learning to be a parent is no different than learning a new instrument or sport. With lots of practice and hard work your confidence builds. As you become more confident you feel more successful, allowing your skills to grow and flourish.
Think back for me, have you ever played an instrument or a sport? Were you successful? Why? Who was the most influential person to your success during that time?
The coach, right?
Growing up I was a competitive figure skater. The many hours/days/weeks/months that I spent on the ice would have been useless without the guidance of a pretty stellar coach. Today, watching my boys play hockey I recognize the exact same thing. Left to their own agenda my boys would just skate aimlessly around the rink, occasionally taking a “trick shot”, missing, and then playing around some more with their friends. At that rate how would they ever get any better…confident…even successful as amateur hockey players?
If we hire coaches to help us gain confidence in our abilities to play an instrument or learn a sport, why don’t we seek them out to help us with arguably the most important role in our lives – parenting?
A simple literature search on the effects of maternal support and education during the post-partum period will give you numerous articles about the unparalleled benefits such support and education can have in preventing some of the disastrous effects of post-partum depression or worse post-partum psychosis.
Just the other day I was talking with my coworker. Her cousin’s wife just had a baby girl. By the time that baby was six days old she had been to the pediatrician three times and the emergency room once. Talk about stressful – for both the baby and the parents! The newborn baby was not eating well, her bilirubin levels were higher than normal, mom and dad weren’t sleeping, and sleep was all that princess wanted to do. Feeling lost, they texted my friend (a former NICU nurse) to see if she could come over.
Within one hour of sitting with those new parents my friend could see the relief and a little bit of confidence flooding back into their faces. She could not believe how frazzled and exhausted those new parents looked when she first got to their house. During their visit that little princess was the perfect actor. Much like a coach, my friend used the cues that the baby provided in order to teach the new parents common baby behaviors – both good and troublesome. She showed them some simple techniques to feed a sleepy baby, how to manage the issues their baby was having with standard nursing tricks, and signs that the baby might need to go back to the doctor. AMAZING! One hour! That’s all it took to empower these new parents. To help them gain the confidence needed to feel like successful parents – whatever that means!
As new parents – or even not so new parents – we underestimate the benefits of having someone help us.
The images we see of other parents are always ones that show how amazing life is…how perfect their baby is…how beautiful and relaxed they are…Bull Sh%*! Let me be the person to burst that bubble! Life as a new mama or daddy is NOT perfect! It is not easy! It sometimes takes superhuman strength to just make it to lunchtime…let alone dinnertime with a new baby in the house. Don’t underestimate how helpful support during this time can be! Sometimes all we need is a little coaching to help get us back on track and feel more confident as parents. My wish for you is to find a coach – whoever that may be – a grandmother, a close friend, a kind neighbor, even CLE Mommy, RN. Listen to their kind words. Be open to their gentle suggestions. Accept their praise and support.
You are already an AMAZING parent!
We all need a little convincing of that at times.
If this resonates with you, leave a comment below. Tell me the person who “coached” you through your first few days as a new parent.
Know someone that will soon be a new parent or grandparent? Encourage them to check out CLE Mommy, RN.
CLE Mommy, RN is devoted to EMPOWERING new parents with the exact knowledge they need to care for their new baby. Every new family is treated to private, individualized, expert newborn education classes in the comfort of their own home. Taking prenatal newborn care classes is like learning how to play an instrument before you even own it. Don’t make that mistake. Contact CLE Mommy, RN now to book your private session!